There are two kinds of people in this world. People who wake up at 2:13 in the morning, realize they’re hungry, and go back to sleep. And people who understand that the universe has issued a snack-related emergency. I am the second kind. I entered the kitchen quietly. Not because I was trying to hide anything. Because snacks behave differently when they know you’re coming. The refrigerator light came on. We made eye contact. I surveyed my options. Leftover pizza, string chees